Random Acts of Nothing

So some time ago I committed myself to performing Random Acts of Kindness. Honestly, I have not done so well with keeping up with it; being keenly aware of needs around me however, I have done a few things. Imagine, would you, if every person would just do one random nice/helpful thing a day. It could be a John Lennon song, really.

I've run into stumbling blocks along the way and it baffles me and frustrates me. Do you know most people don't want help? My offers have been turned down far more than accepted. I understand, sadly, we live in a world where you can't trust people you don't know and sadder still, people automatically get suspicious of someone offering help. What's the hidden agenda?

None.

I just want to help.

There is an old man I often see walking from our local Wal-Mart carrying bags of groceries. He walks with a heavy limp and his face always looks strained as if he's in pain or the effort of walking is quite a labor for him. He walks in every sort of weather condition. I know his journey is long because the direction in which he's headed is a business district and there is not any residential housing for miles. I have stopped on many occasions offering him a ride, each time he gives me an angry look, shakes his head no and if he has a free hand, waves me off. He's annoyed, simply annoyed that I even offer.

I think about this man a lot and wonder what makes him so angry when he's offered a ride. I've seen other people stop and offer him rides too and he reacts the same way. Maybe he just likes to walk. Maybe he's offended by people feeling sympathetic towards him. Maybe he fears his safety. Maybe he's just a proud stubborn man.

Pride.

Yesterday leaving Wal-Mart we saw a man and woman standing along side the road with a sign that read, "Family needs food. Please help." Ugh. I hate that! Well, I do sort of hate begging because, "For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat." (2 Thessalonians 3:10) and that seems clear enough to me. But that's not what I hate. I hate to see a family in need, it makes me quite sad. You never know a person's circumstances -- how they got to be in such need. I wanted to go talk to the couple and if I determined they were not just swindlers, get them some groceries but I was in traffic and in the wrong lane to approach them so I couldn't make it. I set out to go home and go back but no sooner than the image of them standing on the side of the road left my eyes, I had forgotten all about them. I wonder if they went to bed hungry. I did not.

I'm such a poor Random Kindness person.

Now I am just left frustrated. People don't want help. That's mostly true. Those that need the help the most seem to be full of either pride or fear. Those that just want to get something for nothing are more than eager to accept a free-hand offering. I try to stay clear of them. Maybe I approach people with an air of arrogance. I hope not. It's not my heart nor my intention. Maybe I look all scary in my "soccer mom" van. I just don't know.

" . . .From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked." (Luke 12:48). I don't live in a mansion, ivory tower or even a very large home. I don't have luxury cars, expensive jewelry or a big fancy wardrobe. As far as having "much", I don't live like that. However; I have much more than I need and that compels me to give.

I'm just so bad at it, I guess.